1. |
Bubblehead
00:33
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Oh My God. What Is that?!
That blister on your head is creeping me out.
It looks like it could blow any second.
OH DEAR LORD, WHAT COULD IT BE?
Every time I go to pet you, I'm afraid I will touch that blister. It's going to get nasty juice on my hand, Holy Shit, That'd be disgusting.
I'm really sorry I'll pet you when it's gone.
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2. |
Don't Touch That Cat
00:36
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Why the fuck can't you understand?
I'm only trying to be nice.
but you, just, keep, hissing.
You would be a really nice cat if you weren't so mean.
No wonder you're always locked in the closet.
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3. |
Bruno From Mars
01:23
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Now there's alot of cats in the world out there.
Bruno man, You are weird.
You're big dark eyes, and your light orange hair.
Spazzed out behavior, You're from Mars I swear.
Crawling through the ceiling.
Sitting in the kitchen sink.
You never stop running.
Attacking everything in sight.
Chasing other animals.
All you do is fucking play.
Look like you're from outer space.
But bruno, I think you're OK.
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4. |
||||
You have the softest fur I've ever felt in my life.
C H L O E
why are you always hiding from me?
I just want to pet you, You look so pretty.
You're probably scared because Drew often beats you.
No, I'm just kitten, Drew wouldn't do that.
I just want to be your friend.
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5. |
Poor Poor Logan
01:27
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whooaaa, Oh baby, Logan, Groovy.
Logan, you are so adorable,
but you, are kind of an idiot.
silky grey fur, you look like a seal.
and you huff like one too.
logan you are such a scaredy cat, but who could blame you?
all the other cats mistreat you.
especially Jackson, practically rapes you.
I remember one time, I walked in.
ON you, and Jackson.
You looked so terrified.
You didn't know what to do.
Oh Logan, Why do you put up with that?
You could kill him if you wanted to.
You are like three times bigger.
Logan, Just stick up for yourself.
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6. |
Action Jackson
01:13
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Why do you keep on meowing?
I'm not letting you outside.
Its dangerous. It's cold outside.
You'll just be back in ten seconds.
Oh Jackson. You're driving me crazy. Just stop meowing.
MEOW MEOW MEOW MEOW
You're a nice cat, You're very friendly. but you meooow. all the time. Just stop. stop meowing.
I'm not letting you outside.
I'm not letting you outside.
Just Stop Fucking Meowing.
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7. |
Someone Stop Romeo
00:46
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I thought You'd be really nice.
at ten years old, I trusted you.
I gave you a pet, but you declined.
Romeo, You are one mean feline.
R O M E O
Before I knew it I was being attacked.
Your claws digging in, your teeth sticking in.
I said we were pals, but i'm taking it back.
You wouldn't let go and I started to cry.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
R O M E O
Help me.
Someone Stop Him.
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8. |
Have You Seen This Cat?
01:38
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Nala, where did you go?
Jumped out my aunt's window.
I was just 8 years old.
Nala I missed you so.
I remember one time when my sisters put you in the pool to see if you could swim. I rescued you and locked myself in the bathroom for hours. I cried my eyes out. but you just up and left when my aunt was taking care of you. FUCK YOU.
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ThrashKitten Chicago, Illinois
Not cool enough to have someone write my bio for me. Not lame enough to write one myself.
Streaming and Download help
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